Twenty Things That I Will Never Do

BooMaMa did this today. So did my bloggy friend Beth.

1. I will never win So You Think You Can Dance, American Idol or America's Next Top Model. I am too old.

2. I will never never have a butler, chauffeur or personal manager. I may get a Super Nanny though.

3. I will never live in a spotless house.

4. I will never have 16 children. It is very likely I will never have four.

5. I will never have a child named Seven, Coco, Fifi-Trixibelle, Calico, Paris or Apple.

6. I will never live on the estate next door to Angelina and Brad's new 60 million dollar home.

7. I will never fit into a pair of size 2 jeans.

8. I will never give up carbs, meat, dessert or red wine.

9. I will never fit into a size 4 pair of jeans again.

10. I will never understand how a microwave, the Internet or even television works. I think I'm pretty smart, but there are definitely people 100 million times smarter than me.

11. I will never complain, be upset or lose sleep if Hilary manages to steal the nomination from Obama (I know this is a complete reversal of my earlier opinion. However, after watching months of news coverage, I have come to the conclusion that she is less scary than he is.)

12. I will never water ski or go tubing in the ocean. I've seen jaws too many times.

13. I will never wear ugly or uncomfortable clothing just because it is stylish.

14. I will never wear Lee Press On Nails (do they still make them?).

15. I will never use a tanning bed again.

16. I will never be embarrassed that I saw New Kids on the Block in concert. Tiffany opened for them.

17. I will never think that Napoleon Dynamite was as funny as the rest of the world thinks it was.

18. Unless my family is starving, I will never hunt, butcher an animal, break a chicken's neck or fillet a fish.

19. I will never have a job that pays much money. Sigh.....that MSW was so worth it though....

20. I will never climb Everest or participate in an Extreme Sport. I do however wish I could get my friends to form a Dodge Ball team so that we could play in the league at the Y.

If you make a list let me know!